Date: Friday, November 30, 2007
Time: 10:17:00 PM

Ok, suddenly I have plenty of issues that I wanna talk about. Just some thoughts that came by this few days.

Firstly, 2 nights ago.. I dreamt of the sweet looking males twins that I had as my students a few months back. And last night, I dreamt of the guy I used to have a serious crush on during my secondary school days. In that dream, it seemed that he had a twin whom was interested in me but I was only interested in him and not his twin. But in reality, he has no twin brother. And in today's context, I have long forgotten about him since he's so much in love with his gf of 7 years. Am just wondering why he suddenly came into my dream. A week ago, I dream of being licked by a dog!! Imagine that??! It was the most scariest dream ever! It's more of a nightmare.

Secondly, I really missed my former customers. It had been a while since I last contacted them though there are a few close ones whom are still constantly keeping in touch with me. School has taken a great chunk of my time and yeah I missed all the people who have given me the most beautiful memories of my life.

Onto this issue, as you all know, Vivo is just 3 minutes away from my place. Henceforth, there is a tendency for me to dress down if there was a need to run an errand at Vivo. But, whenever I am at Vivo, the chances of running into my former customers are very high. Therefore, I can't afford to dress down. It's the image! Just now, while I was at Vivo after months of hiatus, I was lucky that I didnt run into anyone that I know off cos I was quite slack and am on the couldn't be bothered attitude. I had friends who said that I shouldn't bother to dress up if I were to go to Vivo. So, my question is... to dress up or dress down?? And, chances of running into my former students are also very high. Life as a teacher is quite similar to a celebrity cos your students are very excited when they see you at the malls, etc.. provided you're very popular among your students, of course, if not they will avoid you like hell. Haha.. Anyway, I hate my current lifestyle for I have no freedom to enjoy my shopping unless I go to neighbourhood malls outside my comfort zone. Haiz...

This morning, I had a missed call. I had a feeling that it was from a former customer of mine cos the number looks so familiar. However, she's hell of the most difficult customer I ever came acros. And.. why would she contact me? I left the company like almost 9 months ago.. who cares? I better stay away from her. Lol..

These few days as I am busy getting my event into place, there are some funny incidents that I thought it would be nice to share some people's stupidity. I am not being a smug but as I read their emails, I just do not know how to react. Should I give them a piece of mind or should I just laugh at their irresponsible attitude yet asking questions as if they were damn innocent.

There are some who made my day. They are the ones who really work together with me and they are the ones who are my pillars of strength. They gave me hope when I was on the verge of giving up, they called me up when they sense that I might need help, they volunteered their service even before I could ask for it. They are the people who have touched my heart. And to you people, thank you so much for being there with me. And, its because of you people that I am still here as your leader.

And, these two days I have been up till 5-6 am doing my team report, sorting out the events stuff. My mum must be wondering why am I working so hard even though its the hols. And I doubt she even knows if I was already on hols since god knows when. Hahah..

Alrighty.. gonna play more games before I start on my report again.

Date: Thursday, November 29, 2007
Time: 10:54:00 PM

Yesterday, I finally got my arse moving albeit having some disruptions here and there. Firstly, I managed to clear my wardrobe a lil and create some breathing space for all my ironed clothings. Yes, I have been buying new clothes every time I see nice ones to the extent that my mum has been complaining that my wardrobe is bursting out. Haha..

Then, I settled down in front of my desktop to play some games. After a few hours, I decided to throw away all the letters/bills/papers/notes that are redundant. And, it was back to playing more games. Somehow, I am getting sick and tired of downloading and playing all the available online games. Thus, I decided to do some serious work.

After weeks of getting on my nerves and spoiling my days rotten, my license application has been approved. Hence, I had to start doing the ground work lest people start accusing me of giving last minute notice. Even so, there are still people who refuse to reply to my email. Even so, there are still people who don't understand my simple english. Even so, there are people who tries to "avoid" reading my e-mails/posts/sms-es.

No matter what their reasons are, I seriously do not give a damn FARK over the whole issue. All I care is, I have done my part and am still doing my part. And what I know is, I have fulfilled the minimum hours needed, all thanks to having to babysit overgrown adults.

If you guys are fond of complaining, go ahead. What else can I say? I have limited capabilities. If you think you're more capable then I am, you're welcome to take over my role. I'll be more glad to do so. At least, I won't have to bother about anything and enjoy my holidays peacefully. And, I will save some money from wasting sms-ing the walls. And, I will also save my brain cells.

Whatever it is, my report has been completed. Edited, printed and sorted out. Everything is near completion. And all I need is everyone to co-operate when the event begins in 3 weeks' time. I am not asking much. Just 3 hours of your time in exchange of the weeks of meetings that I let you guys off. I did the grounds work without asking anyone for help. I let you all off because I know you guys have endless of projects and assignment to complete. And so do I. Whatever you guys are busy with, I was in the same predicament only that I have an extra burden which I took because I let you all off from sharing it with me. I do not mind doing it cos it means less work for me. Planning a meeting isn't easy for me cos I have to prepare the agenda and minutes. Not to mention the endless quarrels and unnecessary dumb Qs which do left me speechless at times.

So people, for the sake of that piece of cert, please co-operate cos whatever you do is going to be assessed by me. If you expect me to be sial, I can be as SIAL as SIAL can be. Trust me. And for those who have worked with me before, you should know how ugly my temper can get as I strike for perfection. Like he said, "Perfecting Perfection- Is it Beneficial or Detrimental?"

Anyway, I am really relieved that the license has been approved. I hope to settle my paper work by today and get some fresh air tomorrow. Adik is coming over this Saturday. He'll be with me for a week or so. I have yet to plan how to spend the time with him and I got to liaise with the organisation for the event. oooh, where's my holidays??

In exactly a month's time, my trip will be here. Yipee...!! Gonna have fun and that's for sure. Glad that it's KL cos there will be an opportunity to shop for Raya's clothings. It will be fun knowing that I won't have headache searching for Raya's clothes on the eve of Raya come Sept 30th next year. And, it had been 3 years since I last went to KL not to mention that I had to give Malacca a miss due to the event. Ooh well...

Alrighty.. going to do my secretarial work now... Toodles!

Date: Monday, November 26, 2007
Time: 11:35:00 PM

So, the exams ended like a week ago. What supposedly should happened after the exams was a real good sleep and a real cleaning of the room. But what really happened was, none of those planned items actually happened.Hahaha...

So what happened was, I was hooked on online games together with my close buddy. We have been like glued to the computer day in and day out till the wee hours of the morning. And, now that I've given my laptop a very much deserved break, I am hitting on the desktop for more games galore! Hahaha..

And another not so exciting moments during the days after the exams were the application of the license. It had taken a toll of my patience level and I am getting frustrated because of this. Haiz. Hope everything will be over soon.

Went to JB over the weekends. Bought some book at Harris. Went shopping at Jusco in Tebrau and found a new seafood place at Senibong. It had been a while since the last time I went to JB.

I had some cash balance from my last trip. And spend so much so I converted more Sing $ to RM. I just calculated my balance. To my horror, I did not touch the money that I converted and in fact there were still some balance from the previous balance. This was because I actually used my card to pay for my expenditure. Yeah, I can be that merepek. Lol..

Luckily, I would be going to KL for about 5 days come next month. So, the cash would definitely come in a handy and will definitely need to change more. Hahah...

Ok, going back to the game plan.. Will try to sleep early tonight. Going out tomorrow so I wil definitely need time to clean my room. Outz!

Date: Thursday, November 22, 2007
Time: 10:19:00 PM

So... exam ended last Tuesday. Bought myself an external hard drive after that. Still unopened though. Haha..

Babysat the three musketeers on Wednesday. Adik looked disappointed when I told him I wanted to go home last night. I wanted to bring him home but I still got to tie some loose ends first before I can finally RELAX! So, probably by next week I can have some fun with him.

Yesterday, I took a cab from Adik's place which left me so frustrated. I got a dumb, unhygienic and disgusting driver to drive me home. And I am still frustrated with the whole issue. Here's what happened. As usual, I flaged down a cab at my usual spot. I was already so tired and drowsy (thanks to the flu medicine which I almost have to rely on daily these days). All I wanted was a smooth and safe ride home. But, somehow.. I thought of playing games on my handphone which I just purchased that evening.

Here's what happened:

Driver (D): Where to?
Me (M): Bukit Purmei.
D: Where? Kampong Bahru there?
M: Near Telok Blangah(for fear he takes a wrong and unfamiliar route)
D: Which way do you want to go?
M: By BKE exit Dairy Farm, then by AYE Clementi Ave 6
D: Silence ( I presume he has acknowledged my directions and I am all ready to begin my game)

At the junction near the Al-Iman mosque, whereby if you turn left is the road leading straight to BKE with huge sign showing the direction, he stopped at the traffic lights and asked me this dumb question.

D: Go straight?
M: No, you turn left here.
(Driver was silence as if to show his disappointment that his passenger knows her way, so no chance to rip off extra fares from her!) And.. he went real slow and I was already frustrated.

When we reach the exit at Dairy Farm, he asked me another question which almost pissed me off and I almost wanted to just alight in the middle of the expressway.

D: Here ar? Here ar? Can go here?
M: Yeah, exit Dairy Farm.
D: (still trying his luck to frustrate me and trying his chance to rip me off some extra money) Sure can go?
M: (almost erupting) YEAH?! YES GO STRAIGHT! YEAH WHY CANNOT?
(If home was nearby, I would just gave him a piece of my mind and scoot off. Unfortunately, it was still far away and I was already so drowsy. I raised my voice and he kept quiet. But, I was still frustrated cos the signs were all over. AND, as a cab driver you should know your way. Even if you dun, you can check with the passenger. By checking with the passenger, does not mean you go all out to frustrate them!)

The journey was like I said, slow. Any slower, he would get it from me. Seriously. And along the way, he was wiping his mucus with his hands. BARE Hands! Imagine the agony I was in?

The initial plan of paying by my credit card was shelved because I couldn't imagine how dirty and how am I going to keep that card for the next few years! So, I decided to use the $20 bucks that I have in my pockets. But, I was thinking the change that I will received will be tainted with his germs and whatnots. Then, I remembered that I had $26 in my wallet. The fare was $12++. I am not going to get any change from him. That means I must give him exact change. Luckily for me, I had lotsa coins in my pouch. So, I gave him an exact change. For the first time on a cab ride that I have given a driver an exact change.

Anyway, my point is this. I am not looking down on cab drivers. But I detest cab drivers who takes the slightest chance to cheat their passengers and those who never took the effort to know their way around the country. New or old drivers, I am sure you know your way around Singapore, if not how the hell you earn that license of yours?!

Precisely, this is why I hate to take cabs. And, I take a cab only when necessary. Sometimes, I took a cab because I do not know my way to a certain place. But, it frustrates you further when the cab driver feign ignorant and take the chance to cheat you of your money. To these kind of drivers, let me tell you all... your life is not safe earning your income through cheating your customers' hard earned money! And, if I ever come across this kind of driver, I will make sure you will lose your license and income. Trust me. I am really frustrated! It reminds me of one incident when I first wanted to go to my cousin's place at Fajar.

Seriously, 4 years ago.. Fajar was an unknown place. Never heard of it and never went there before. So, since I was already late for my appointment as I had guests over at my place, I took a cab down to Fajar. Then, still young and innocent, when the cab driver asked me which way would I like to go by. I told him honestly that it was my first time and I do not know how to go.

So he took me for a ride. And earned a lot out of me! Blardy Bugger! To get to AYE from my place, is just by turning left from Lower Delta Road. But he took me all the way to Jalan Bukit Merah which I seriously thought he was going to use the expressway (sorry cant recall the name of the expressway). So, I kept quiet. To my horror, he did a U-Turn and go to AYE. Blardy hell! I am so frustrated as I remember that incident! Like I say, I was young and innocent. So, I didn't remember to jot down his plate number. If not, I will make sure he gives me a public apology and lose his blardy job!

I can be that extreme. So, never ever step on my toes or you'll be sorry. Trust me, cheating won't bring you anywhere. Better be safe then sorry. I have said my piece. The rest, is up to you to decide.

Date: Monday, November 19, 2007
Time: 7:04:00 PM

As of tomorrow... exams will be history till the next semester. I could forsee that I am going to do real badly for this sem's malay modules. Blame it on all the english modules and all the projects that I had to complete (majority of it was done by me and me alone!). And also, blame it on me for losing my concentration prior to the exam period.

And after tomorrow.. I will be lost for a moment. I am unsure of what plans do I have in mind. All I need is just SLEEPS and live without any worries. Haiz.. if only that could be done.

Anyways, our tickets have been booked. We'll be gone for 5 good old days! How exciting!

There's another project coming along and the blardy licensing application is taking forever! I want to get it over and done with asap so that it will minimise any/or whatever worries that I have.

Ok.. I am going to do my readings now...

Date: Wednesday, November 14, 2007
Time: 5:14:00 PM

I deserved one tight slap!



It's either I am too distracted by his return or I wasn't focussed enough. I knew some piles of my notes were missing and I couldn't be bothered to find it. Instead, I came up with excuses that there were no lectures on those days. Which was really ridiculous. And, that pile of notes has a lot of info for me to digest. And I am really freaking out now!



Yet, I could still be in the mood to blog! Don't I deserved a real tight slap?!

Date: Monday, November 12, 2007
Time: 4:40:00 PM

His return has somehow distracted me albeit giving me the strength to continue with my revision. His images never fail to crept into the whatever empty spaces left on my brain. And, how distracted I'd become.

I've said that I will be away from the virtual world till 20th November. But, once a computer geek, forever your home is the virtual world. I somehow managed to stay away from the virtual world the whole of yesterday. But life was sucky.

Today, I had no choice but to enter the virtual world cos I have not even check my seating arrangement for the exams in 3 days' time! haha.. And, there were soccer updates to check, there were emails to reply and when I enter the virtual world, there are things called blog hopping to do, web surfings and checking out profiles to complete the whole sequence. Haha..

So far, revision is crap.. but at least I understand most of the stuff that I have learnt during the last 13 weeks which 'I was hardly there yet mind wasn't there' mode.

Ok people.. I will be seriously be away till Nov 20th. Please call/sms me only if there is urgent matters for me to be in the know. I am going to focus on my revision now.

And to you.. please please and please... stop creeping into my mind all the time. Remember, you have 5 papers to go and I only 2 but those 2 are real torturing to my ageing brain cells! And to me... stop thinking of him! Once the exams are over, I can have him all I want.. haha.. why am I so merepek??

Ok, focus, focus! Things will be a breeze when you're focus. Good luck to you and me! We will clear this hurdle together. Ours is a friendship that has been tried and tested since 2002. You have seen my highest and lowest points in life. So have I witnessed the ups and downs of your life. I will never forget all the things that you've done for me. Yes maybe it's time we start to open a new chapter in our lives together but yeah, you should know all the buts and worries why we couldn't make this happen.

If the current arrangements can make us both happy and contented, why not?

Ooh.. why am I so melancholic-ly jiwang??!

Date: Saturday, November 10, 2007
Time: 2:20:00 PM

I couldn't be any happier.. I'd declared peace with him. We had a slight misunderstanding which I blew it out of proportion given my state of mind at that moment and the stress level we both were facing was just too great to handle.

A few weeks back I was upset, I was really on the verge of giving up whatever I am doing because of some ppl's attitude. As usual, I seek solace in him to give me strength and words of encouragements like he usually did. But somehow, his words seemed like it were against me though I knew he meant well.

Then, I was disappointed because he blamed me for being too nice and a hard cord perfectionist. Well, if you had known me by now, I do strive for perfection in whatever I do. If I know that something is beyond my reach, I wouldn't even waste my time on it. So anyway, we drifted from each other for that 3 weeks or so when supposedly we are to be standing by each other and give encouragements.

I was really upset during that 3 weeks, but somehow I managed to survive because he was still my source of inspiration and motivation. Anyhow, he was the one who approached me first so, fair enough, peace has restored.

Help him yesterday and somehow he gave me the strength to begin my sastera revision albeit it was already 3 am! The wonders of love? Haha.. maybe!

For those who may be thinking if I am in a relationship...? No, I am not. Even if I am, it won't last long given the fact that I don't even have a proper life right now. Anyway, my relationship with him is mutual. whatever happens between us in future, I'll gladly accept it. Our aim now is, for me to clear Sem 1 and for him to clear his exams. I will assist him with his work again once I am done with my exams.

Urgh... linguistik? Ooh what fun! I am kidding myself crazy like always. Hahhahaa...

Date: Friday, November 9, 2007
Time: 10:19:00 PM

The after effect of the flu medication was indeed too strong for me to handle.Earlier, I mentioned that I was down with a very bad influenza attack yesterday. Yes, what a bummer... on a PH at that! But who cares abt PH? I am study break anyway.. PH or not, there are assignments to be completed, revisions to go through. However, the influenza attack was so bad that I could hardly concentrate on my essay which was supposed to be submitted today.

But I persisted to complete it by all means. Unfortunately, by 7 pm I couldn't take it anymore and I had to rely on my medication which made me even drowsy! I fought hard agst the urge to just sleep and continued to complete my essay. But I could only stay up till the last word that I typed.

I didn't couldn't even be bothered to vet my essay. And yes, I slept ard 12 am all the way till about 10 am this morning. 10 hours of sleep later, I was still subconsciously awake! I had 4 missed calls and ignored the ringing of my alarm. Immediately upon waking up, I vetted my essay and printed it out. Got ready to school for submission.. It was only in the train that I thought of 1 important point for my essay which will make it a sound argument. But, yeah it was all too late.

As planned, after dropping off my essay, I went to town. But due to the after effect of the medication, I took the wrong bus to town. Like, what's new with me?? I can't remember what I was thinking when I was so adamant that 157 goes to town!! I refused to take 174 because it doesn't stop in front of Lucky Plaza. So, I thought it was 157 that plies along Lucky Plaza. But, how wrong I got my numbers! It should be 106 from Bukit Batok!! yeah, shoot me! Urgh...!

Anyway, I found my way to town. Bought and splurge on lotsa lingeries! Its on sale and I got a set of Calvin Klein's at 60% off like wow~! But I am going down to town again tomorrow because I just found out that they double charged me?!! Blardy hell.. its gonna be a showdown if they refused to reimburse me and not to mention an unnecessary trip.

Am just thinking.. why are people trying to suck my money for no reason...?? Though its nothing much but its a test of your integrity in doing business people.. I will shame you people for all these dirty tricks of sucking customers' money if you resort in trying to cheat me!

Ok.. gotta clean my room and do some revision. Gonna wake up early tmr and showdown. Let me unleash the bitchy-ness in me!

Date:
Time: 11:33:00 AM

My essay completion was disrupted by a bout of serious influenza attack. The four pills I took last night caused me to go into deep slumber till 10 am this morning. It was a good 10 hours sleep. No complains. But my throat feels so dry and my head still spins.

Gonna shower in a while and back to school for essay submission. Will update again later.

Date: Wednesday, November 7, 2007
Time: 4:17:00 PM

Went to school in the afternoon yesterday to hand in my essay. By the time I reached school, I was so sleepy and the hot weather did not help at all. I was on the verge of fainting! Then, it was off to the northern part of Singapore to meet up with one of my close pal to try to attempt our Ed Psy 1 essay.

Met my friend and another friend around 3 pm. About 2 hours later, there was hardly anything on my word document. I was just going to fall asleep anytime. So, my friend suggested that we go to her place. And, so off we went.

Did some skeleton of the essay and left my friend's place after 11 pm. We chatted and played games more than we actually attempt our essay. But at least we have some directions and moving towards that long essay assignment. I have more or less written 490 words out of 2000 words. I will get my brain and hands to co-ordinate and co-operate once again, in a very short while.

We finally decided on our holiday vacation. Nothing grand, nowhere far. But, definitely it gonna be hell lotsa fun. I am so looking forward to that break and of course for semester 1 to end.
Here's a sneak preview of my Nov/Dec 2007 and January 2008 plan:

1. Nov 9th: Submission of Ed Psy 1 Essay
2. Nov 15th: Linguistik Exams
3. Nov 20th: Sastera Exams + Farewell gathering for a friend
4. Nov 20th-25th: Planning for upcoming GESL event (Full force)
5. Nov 25th onwards: Meeting up with ex-customers/colleagues/friends, Fun and fun with adik/shopping/sleep and sleep/ Batam trip!
6. Dec 1st: Two weddings to attend
7. Dec 4th: Should I attend Bengkel Praktikum? ( Will decide on Friday)
8. Dec 22nd: GESL event (Venue and time confirmed. Need approval from the police)<-- All are welcome to give your support for my team.
9. Dec 27/28th till Jan 01/02: Holidays!!!
10. Jan 6th: Back to school... what a bummer!

I really hope to have a real relaxing holiday. This year seemed like the most days I had holidays and vacations.. 3 weeks break after leaving Spin b4 joining the education fratenity. 1 month long school break in June. 1 week of e-learning (no school but assignments are done online...stressful but fun!). 1 week recess week (stressful days with assignments and projects!). 1 week of study break (what break u say??) and of course looking forward to the 5 weeks break in December. Hence, in total I had 15 weeks of break! This is exclusive of public holidays and weekends. Not to mention those days I took time off from working while at Spin.. 14 weeks' worth of weekends, Fridays which are free from classes... you guys do your maths just how many days I was actually 'working'!

You will never want to be in my shoes, seriously...

But thank you to those who have been encouraging me all this while. I heart you all!!

Date: Tuesday, November 6, 2007
Time: 9:25:00 AM

The past 1 week has been an absolute torture. As I flipped through my books and did my research, many important points came into the picture. But as I embark on my 2500 essay, every important point seemed to disappear. And, the flipping starts all over again. Reading the text wasn't an easy task either. Firstly, I wasn't even interested about the guy that I was reading. Secondly, I wasn't interested in the literature genre that he wrote. Thirdly, it had been almost 4 years of hiatus for a literature in malay assignment. Seriously, it wasn't easy. Furthermore, I was battling sleepy days as well. Thus, making me think in the wee hours of the morning seemed a futile effort.

I began typing the skeleton of the essay on Saturday had more than 1800 words by Sunday night. But, it was all deleted on Monday afternoon on purpose. What I wrote made no head or tail and it was pure distraction. So yeah, delete it!

Time was running out. That Monday afternoon was yesterday, by the way. And the essay submission is Today. And, I felt like crying because I couldn't produce a decent piece of essay. But, I forced myself to write this essay. In the end, by 1.30 am this morning, 18 pages of essay and 3200 words later, I wasn't quite satisfied with that piece of work. I know I could have done better if I had been given a much lighter essay. But, I know I have put in the effort so, I should get the marks somehow. Insya-allah.

Will be making my way to school in a few hours time to submit my essay. Meeting up with my close pal to embark on another piece of essay. It would be done in English. So I don't see much problem in that. Hopefully..

I hope to finish my last piece essay with a bang by tomorrow night and revision gotta start ASAP! The first paper is about in a week's time.And, I am worrying cos seriously I know nuts about what I have been learning. Well, that's a lie but I seriously need to brush all these in one week of pure revision and nothing else.

Am looking forward to 20th November where I will be sitting for my final paper. And yeah, the preparation for my GESL project 2 will start then. I had a busy morning as well yesterday. I had to complete my project proposal, had endless emails exchange with the organiser, the school officials and also my BOSS! What's with the rest who suddenly had so many queries about this and that... and so, being at the top wasn't an easy task.

I knew that but I chose to play with fire. Despite knowing the dangers, I still threw myself into the pit and now am burdened with huge responsibilities. But let's just look on the positive side. Firstly, under my leadership, at least we have completed something. Secondly, at the end of the day, I will get to enjoy the fruits of my labour. Finally, it feels great when the Boss thinks I have been doing a great job and constantly praising me for it. Though, I know I could have done better and be a better leader. But, I just couldn't be bothered cos there are other things that are much more important than this. And, I know I have done a lot compared to some people but I am not going to claim the credits. I will let the Boss decide and the organiser to seal my fate.

Ok, its time to start my research for my psychology essay. Peace out!

Date: Friday, November 2, 2007
Time: 3:05:00 PM

As nonsensical/merepek I can get, my mind just simply refused to be as witty and co-operative when it comes to serious matter. I have been immersing myself with thick literature texts since the beginning of this week. But sadly to say, till today, I could only understand about 10 % of what I have read.

As obvious as day, I have two individual assignments which are due next week and two major exams to sit for a week from now. Honestly, I feel like peeing in my own pants seeing that I am not moving towards the finishing line. Grr...!!

After years of ignorance, I am finding it very hard to write something decent in malay. And yes, writing a 2500 essay in malay has not been my forte either. So... how am I going to survive this phase? I got another 1500-2000 words essay in english to battle on. Urgh...!

I will try, try and try to complete these pieces of assignments. I will psycho myself. I will treat myself with the much deserved holiday come December and yes, my motivation is there. I will survive this last hurdle with flying colours!!

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Last night, he came back. But I couldn't be bothered to acknowledge his return for I am still hurt by his words. Though his words meant no harm, just to wake me up from giving others to much face and end up suffering myself, I couldn't accept what he told me. His words were no longer words of comfort or encouragements. It was like he was also one of those who blamed me for giving those idiots too much face! I am not sure how long this cold war between us would last, but I do know that your presence is important for me to hold on during this phase.
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