Date: Tuesday, July 31, 2007
Time: 11:17:00 PM

I am so excited. Really looking forward to this coming Thurs!! But I am not going to mention anything here yet cos I do not wish to spoil the fun and also its just a taboo for me to talk about it. So, if you are interested to know about what's going to happen on Thurs, just stay tune. Will update it.

This afternoon, I received a text msg from a former regular. Informing about bad customer service. I couldn't say much about this issue because I've told myself not to get involved in it anymore. Firstly, with school commencing in a few days time, I'll have no time to go down and meet up with them personally to pacify their upsetting moments. Secondly, I am no longer working with the company and I am not the PR officer to address this issue. One thing for sure, I know they contacted me because they were giving me 'face'.

Cos, they were 'pulled in' by my persuasion and sincerity. Cos, they've promised me that they'll still show their support once I left. But I also am aware that many of my pioneer regulars have abandoned the place ever since I left. But, like 'J' said before after hearing my decision of resigning, he without any hesitation said that sales would drop drastically. I am not so sure about that but based on what I hear and feedbacks that I received from the former regulars, it seemed that what 'J' has predicted is becoming true.

But I am not getting involved. Period. I have my own stuff to worry about. What's with the 'Semangat 60 saat' guy... I'll fill u in on that guy soon.. But best if I don't even talk about him.

Date: Monday, July 30, 2007
Time: 9:22:00 AM

He almost became my favourite player. In fact, I enjoyed watching him playing the left back position at United. And, I think he is a better player than Evra. No offence to any Evra's fans.

I am talking about Gabriel Heinze @ Gaby. I felt at ease whenever I saw his name on the first 11. I felt secured when Gaby marshalled the United defence during the time when Neville was out with injuries. Gaby was a hard tackling defender. One who's always ready to fight on.

He was out with an injury during his first season at United. But everyone at United stood by him. Even Sir Alex did not mentioned about selling him off. And, during that moment.. how Gaby said he was glad that Sir Alex kept his faith on him. How he wanted to repay Sir Alex's kindness.

Yet, recently Gaby was in the limelight. For the wrong reason. He wants to join United's arch rival, Liverpool!! How could that be Gaby?? Is that what you mean by repaying Sir Alex's kindness???

No doubt, your place is not guaranteed in United back four. No doubt, you have to fight for your place. But, tell me... which player(s) in the United squad do not have to fight for his place? Perhaps, Edwin van der Sar. But, how sure are you.. by going to Liverpool, your place is guaranteed? And, how sure are you that your future employers will stand by you should you suffer another injury?

Anyways, Gaby... even if you want to part ways with United, why should it be done in such a way where there is great animosity? To such an extent that you want to bring this matter to court. No doubt that life of a professional footballer is complex. But, I am sure you can settle this dispute amicably.

I still believe that you'll earn more medals with United for the next two seasons. Trust me..

Date:
Time: 12:39:00 AM

I have accidentally aggravate my old injuries. That very old injuries that forced me into early retirement from the competitive world of netball. Both my ankles were hurting big time yesterday. But today, it had move up to my shins. My left leg injuries ain't so bad as compared to my right leg. This is due to the fact that I have badly sprained my right ankle twice in a year. And yeah, it hurts a lot when I walk. I could barely chased my nephew.

I hope its just a momentary injury. There are many flights of stairs to climb daily while I am in NIE and not to forget the 199 berth's location. Its a distance from the MRT station. Haiz... If I were to walk that route for the next two years, I would probably have completed walking around Singapore 10x! Hahaha...

Ok, gonna sleep soon.. Have to attend a talk on Sastera tomorrow.. how fun is that?!

Date: Friday, July 27, 2007
Time: 11:15:00 PM

Let me just air out my grievances.

One word, you're just RUBBISH! Don't think you're good cos you're extremely NOT! I am not saying I am good, but I can safely say I am way much better than you! In fact, the rest are way better than you. And to you, I can safely say.. you're just a piece of crap!

Fine, my Friday had been ruined by an idiot. That's all I can say. I am not going to budge an inch and I am sticking to my decision. So will my other mates. To that person, before you open your bloody mouth, go and read up ur handouts as well as refer to the DICTIONARY for 'chimnology' phrases before you just throw out a person's invaluable suggestions.

And, I will do my research on my suggestions for a solid argument. Don't try to mess up with me. I am not one to be trifled with. I don't put up an argument for no reason. And I don't go around condemning people for no good reason either. I've said my piece. I'll pray for a smooth journey ahead. Amin.

Had fun running around during the activities this morning. But, my fitness level is really at its lowest! Dang! And, I have not been doing my sit-ups for two days in a row. I guess, I'll probably do more rounds of swimming tomorrow. And, beginning next weekends.. I'll start building my stamina by running around the estate. Just in time for the OBS. Lol...

P/s: Of late, there are many spelling errors, grammatical errors as well as incomplete sentences on my previous blog entries. I am sorry.. I didnt even bother to edit it. I am really sleepy.

Date: Thursday, July 26, 2007
Time: 11:25:00 PM

I am so looking forward to OBS activity in Dec 2007. It would be nice.. And the best is, I have to great guy friends coming along!! It would be great. We trios are just waiting for the registration period to open in Oct. Hehehe...

I am also thinking of going to India for some voluntary work. But that's pending as I might have too much on my plate. What's with the GESL module target to meet, the OBS activity, the likely trip to Bangkok, the designing task and of course catching up with the Spin chums!

Ok.. I need my sleep now. Ta!

Date: Wednesday, July 25, 2007
Time: 10:47:00 PM

A new change in environment really needs time for adjustments. If during the last 2 1/2 years at Spin and the last 4 mths at the school that I was attached to took me only 10 minutes of travelling time, now it takes about 1 hour or so! Its really taxing especially now that almost all my classes starts at 8.30 am!! With the exception of Fridays where it starts at 1.30 pm! Like... wow!! Haha..

I was practically yawning away... It was really crazy. Listening to all the briefings and stuff.. And, I am given a challenge or rather been challenged to excel in this course! To those who knows me, you should know I hate to be challenged. When I am challenged, I'll make sure I'll exceed your expectations. Insya-allah I will excel in this.

Next, there was this girl in fact a few girls who thought I was attached. They thought I have a boyfriend in school. Like.. omg! I am there to study not to have some love affairs or whatsoever! I rather not be involved in any kind of relationship(s) during this period. A relationship = Straying away from school commitments. I need to focus.

And.. there is no one really special right now. 'C' is so far away.. And, I have to admit I have difficulties sustaining a long distance relationship. 'P' makes me happy when we chat. But we both prefer F2F chats rather than online chats cos we'll always end up talking about heavy and dry subject when we talks online. Kinda boring. Hopefully, he's able to return for a visit in October...

'V'... he left without a word. He had a change of environment. He did it quietly. Anyway, nothing serious about him. Just that I met him quite a lot after the new semester and the crush just develop. Haha..

Actually, I've scraped all these probable targets for a mystery guy. Known this guy so much longer than any of the three mentioned. Our friendship, like I've said before is too pure. Though I have a liking for him ( even in the past), realistically its just impossible to make it happened.

Hence... there is simply no one that can occupy my heart right now. Its either any of the four mentioned or no one else.. Let's just say, they are my shortlisted targets. Hahaha.. Well, if I do end up in London next year... that will mean I've found the person I am going to choose. Anyways, I have about 10 months to decide.

And yeah, I was utterly upset today. And like I said, I have difficulties sustaining a long distance relationships. Hence, whenever the person I like is out of town, I ended up in one of those malls 'throwing' away my money on unnecessary stuff.

I was supposed to go home after the orientation. And I was god damn tired. Somehow, my legs brought me to Vivo. I wanted to but a pullover at MNG but not much varieties. So out I went to Esprit ( I just love Esprit!). But again, zilch. I ended up buying a foldable umbrella. Finally, I convinced myself to buy an umbrella because, I couldn't come up with a foolproof way of navigating the campus. I went to fox and bought a cardigan. The price was at $36. And there were no sign saying that it was a sale item. But when I was paying, the guy told me.. $19 ma'am. It felt so nice to get a discount. Hahahhaa.. Felt quite happy for a while.

I also bought two dresses from C.O.A.X. They were having a 20% storwide discount. I had intended to buy some new dresses when I got my pay like some 2 weeks back. But I did not cos I planned to start saving up. However, because I was down.. I need colours to bright up my day. And on top of the 20% discount, I had an additional 10% off cos I was a member! Hahaha.. I guess I was lucky to wait till today to get those pretty dresses cos everything was on discount compared to two weeks ago!

I thought the damage was quite serious.. but when I checked my account balance, it was still in a healthy position. I feel like shopping again.. its boring to come home knowing that the person who I always talk to is far away from me. So I guess I'll continue doing this till he comes back. 6 years ago when my then bf when to HK for a week, I spent $500 in a single day! Well, let's see what will be the total damage come end of the week. What's with my nephew coming over to my place.. hmmz..

*P/s: Luckily, there were discounts.. I guess the damaged would have been doubled.

Date: Tuesday, July 24, 2007
Time: 10:14:00 PM

5 months back, as I reminisces on my resignation at Spin, everyone made me felt wanted. But on the eve of that really emotional day, someone walked through that sorrows with me, making me smile to sleep. However, last night on the eve of my last day (not resignation but 'upgrading'), that very someone made me cry to sleep.

I am quite upset actually... Not with the fact that I'll be leaving the hostile environment but for the fact that he is constantly present in my life. I've already accepted the fact that we won't be together and might never be together. I've also said I won't be the third party and I've tried to stay away from him. But, what can I do when he keeps on coming back to me?

Last night, tears just trickled down my cheeks as he told me those stuff... Who can I blame? Fate? Or myself?? I guessed I came back way too late!

************

Anyways, today was my last day. Had to relief some classes. And, I have so many P1 kiddos whom no matter how much I scolded them during those brief moments coming up to me to say 'Hi'! And of course, I had many other students who wished me all the best and all.

I love my P3s the best! They are so hilarious. They sang me some song. I almost teared up but.. as usual, I grinned as widely as possible to maintain my composure. And not to forget, my P2s.. it was quite sad that I did not managed to see them! But, my P2s and P3s this me a tiny booklet with their pictures, drawings and well-wishes in it. It was so sweet. So touching! Hahaha..

After school, I had a farewell dinner with my two beautiful ladies. It was quite fun and rare that we, dubbed as the Charlie Angels or sometimes Powerpuff Girls at school, to sit together for a meal. I will definitely miss them and am really grateful for their kind guidance. Hopefully, one day our paths will cross again, insya-allah!

*** Those short 4 months or so had been a tough journey. In a sense that, I didn't quite enjoy the long free periods as I have nothing much to do most of the time. But, I really enjoyed teaching the kiddos. I've learnt quite a number of things and will begin my quest for learning as of tomorrow. It had been an eye opener since the day I embarked into the world of teaching.

Date: Monday, July 23, 2007
Time: 10:05:00 PM

I am beaming with pride and joy. Haha.. just another day left!! Yipeee..! Somehow, there's a tiny feeling of sadness looming in the tiny corner of my heart. That's me, emotional 24/7! Hahaha..

When tomorrow approach, I don't expect a grand farewell like how my departure from Spin was. Nor do I expect anything. Nothing beats the memories I had at Spin as compared to the current environment. However, I've just started getting along fine with some of the colleagues yet it's time for me to open a new chapter of my life. And, my life goes on...

I know, tomorrow I might get emotional. Not because I'll leave that place. But because, I'll be reminded of my departure from Spin, exactly 5 months ago. But, I know.. tomorrow I won't have Big Daddy to make me cry. I won't have gullible customers whom took my made up stories as a reason behind my resignation. Nor do I have eye candies to bid me goodbyes.. But, for sure.. I'll have my happiness and freedom back, albeit temporary. What can I say...?

Goodbye to late nights.. and hello long journeys to school. No more extended sleeping hours knowing that school is just a stone throw away. And, no more luxury of wee hours of the morning to catch LIVE soccer matches. But, I don't care at all. I am willing to sacrifice anything and everything as long as my late night soccer matches are not taken away! Lol..

Ok.. what else can be a better treat to make this week a helluva fun and exciting??? Of course, my dearest and loveliest Adik!! Love him to bits.. and will be spending the weekend with him. Hopefully, a long weekend is granted!!

Now, I understands why adik told me something that day.. Not to me, actually.. to my cousin who is his mum. I couldn't accept the fact there and then but now.. what you said made sense. Though it still hurts but yeah...I guess its just not meant for me!

Date: Sunday, July 22, 2007
Time: 2:37:00 PM

Am fasting again. And ain't in any mood to go out. Hence, I decided to clear my room all over again. I am not sure how many times had I been doing spring cleaning for my room but it is still messy. I am a very appreciative sort of person. Any tiny gifts/drawings that I received, I'll keep till perhaps forever..

But today, due to the space constraint, I threw away a lot of things. Practically almost everything. I threw away whatever memories I've shared with ISD as well as K. And, I felt so much happier! But, as I browse thru those memories.. it seemed that I couldn't remember much from those days..

I am not exactly done with the spring cleaning though. I need to finish some work before I changed my status from a working adult to student (once again). Then, I need to change my bedsheet and do some baking for some of the lovelies in school.

I hope I can do everything before break fast later in the evening. Lol..

Date: Friday, July 20, 2007
Time: 11:48:00 PM

Fuck the Internet system! It seems that its lagging! And, I can't access to some certain website!!

I have a couple of days left. And, this couple of days are sheer torture! And, today someone finally opened up her mouth to say that I am just a 'filler' when necessary so that they can save some $$$! And, she had the cheek to ask me if I could converse in English! At that particular moment, I felt like smacking her face for her arrogance!! No wonder, there are many people who dislikes her. I didn't want to join in the boat but today I finally saw it with my own eyes. But, ironically, she's very clingy to me! Funny right??

Well, I shall see how they will survive once I am gone.. I am not that great there.. but I do pray hard that I won't end up there ever again. The environment there is so fake. Fake as fake can get!

I just hope that for the next few days, nothing will happen.. And, as the closure gets nearer.. I am jumping for joy!

Date: Thursday, July 19, 2007
Time: 10:45:00 PM

Today I went for my registration to NIE. It was raining heavily. And, that moments were used to catch up with the former classmates and schoolmates. Thus, making the journey to and fro less hectic. Made some new friends as well.. That will be nice especially when you're in a competitive environment.

So, another 3 more days of teaching, 10 days of orientation and yes the 2 years journey will go on... It will fly pass quickly, insya allah.

Today, is one of my happiest day.. Don't ask me why.. Hopefully, something would turn out from this pure friendship. I am not asking too much from the friendship.. Just give me this happiness that you've been showering me all this while and I am contented. Only you who knows how to 'navigate' my heart though we might never be together...

Date: Wednesday, July 18, 2007
Time: 11:39:00 PM

I like this particular person.. but I don't dare to tell him about my feelings for him. I fear of ruining our beautiful friendship. This friendship is too pure. But the feelings just sux big time! Argh....!

And, suddenly I thought of the ex-boyfriend. Ironically, I've forgotten most of the stuff I once shared with him. Might as well. It had been 2 1/2 years. But, there are still stuff that as hard as I tried to forget, remained intact. Like, 14.04.01.. the day we met. And, 01.01.05.. the day we finally declared independence for our lives. Plus, whatever else that's shared between us.

So.. another 3 official days at work. I am sinking into nostalgic feelings. As much as I hate the place, and can't wait to leave.. now that my chance is here.. I am sad. Today, during my swan song lesson, my fav kiddo made me pissed and for the second time in 2 weeks, I had to punish him!! I know he's angry with me.. he'll refused to talk to me for a few days. I have to cajole him.. haiz.. darling, you're just so sweet that how I wish you're my son!! Lol...

Date: Tuesday, July 17, 2007
Time: 10:20:00 PM

When people call it a day at work; normally the last few weeks would be the 'honeymoon' period. But for me, the last few days at work is real crazy! It all started from last Monday. I had to do EMS for at least 4 days, apart from my own lessons. Extra workload, lesser time to daydream and also same pay. Lol..

But the new week didn't promise me any sunshine either. Been doing relief yet again. Been tough especially when you're told at the eleventh hour. But, time do passed by very quickly when you're freaking busy.

Today, I stayed back in school till 5.30 pm. Lesson ended at 3 pm. Am I hardworking or what...? Haha.. Truth was, I had an appointment at 6 pm. Didn't want to go home cos its a waste of time and I'll definitely be late for the appointment. I won't be doing anything either.

So, I came up with this idea. Stayed back in school. Mark whatever stuff that have been lying around since I had been busy with reliefs.. And prepare for my swan song class. I managed to complete most of my stuff.. just a little more to go. Fruitful stay in school. Hahaha...

And today again.. I received 2 missed calls from the school. First call, I was in the shower. Second call, I was conducting a class. And, I just simply ignored the blardy phone call. Why do they have to call me incessantly when they can(would) see me when I sign in! Urgh... Even though I have free incoming calls, I am not going to waste my time answering the blardy calls.

Tomorrow is another day to battle.. My rewards?? Off on Thurs!! Yaaay......! Better not be too happy yet. I'll rejoice on Thursday. Hahaha..

Another 4 more days... and it would be goodbye boredom!

Date: Sunday, July 15, 2007
Time: 6:43:00 PM

Today, I forced myself to sleep. Just for the sake of catching up on the lost sleep. And, the rest indeed helped in reducing the black eye bags! Lol..

I looked fresher now. Will be breaking my fast in about half an hour's time. Will watch for TV later and pack my stuff for school tomorrow. Another 6 official days and registration for NIE on Thursday. How fast time flies! Yaay..

Another action packed week coming up. I am thinking on what to do for my kiddos.. Haiz..

I'll probably go shopping on Thurs after the registration. Wanna fast on that day too.

After yesterday's succesful JB trip, I am planning for a Batam trip soon. I want to satisfy my cravings for Donuts! Haha.. I am so nonsensical!

Date: Saturday, July 14, 2007
Time: 11:01:00 PM

It had been a fruitful Saturday, afterall. As much as I hate the idea of waking up early and be in school on a Saturday morning (what's more my plan had to be postponed), there was some kind of 'rewards' at the end of the day.

During the Open House, I met a parent who's daughter would be entering P1 in 2 years' time. I 'promoted' the school to her. Haha.. I felt as if I was back at Spin, doing my upselling. Very nostalgic feelings.

Weirdly, at 12 pm we were 'released' and I quickly zoomed off to JB as planned. Met up with a friend at Kranji and we made our way to JB. Had my hair trimmed and shape it while she had her hair dyed and highlighted.

I was pleased with my hair cut. Then, we went to Tebrau to eat. Had lunch/dinner at The Manhattan Fish Market. They had great service there, compared to the one in Singapore! And, cheaper too! I'll definitely be there again soon enough.

Unfortunately, I am a little upset because.. A&W is gone!! Search high and low yet nothing! Freaking upset! But, guess whom I saw?? Of all people and of all places, I saw my beloved adik Jazziel Amani a.k.a my little devil! Hahaha...

His right eye is recovering. But looks smaller and it looked as if there's an arc on his right eye. Haha.. I guessed he's shocked to see me as much as I was shocked to see him. I love him to bits!

Ok.. I am tired. Wanna do my lesson plan and call it a day!

Date: Friday, July 13, 2007
Time: 11:01:00 PM

The verdict... Everyone loves the cake and there wasn't enough to go around! Oops!

Anyways.. after school I was 'lost'. I didn't know where to go. Wanted to go Serangoon for threading, but I feared I'll lost. Haha.. You see, I fear going to Serangoon. I wanted to roam around Singapore, but I was tired.

Somehow, my tired body found my way to Serangoon! And, somehow I had my 'virgin' threading session. I had imagined extreme pains where I would shout or teared. And, the two old ladies who came after me was talking among themselves about how painful it would be. Bummers!

There was some pain but not so bad. I enjoyed the feeling but not when they did it on my cheeks. Blardy painful. Ok, not blardy painful but ugly. I guessed she threaded away all the hair and my face were bleeding.

And for me, my face turns red easily. So after the session, my face was very red! And, after that I decided to hop into the train to go back. But somehow, my mind refused to co-operate. Paid my bills at Vivo and the legs brought me back to Spin.

And, met 'D' there. He said he could sensed that I was coming. I was so embarrased to see him with my reddish face! Hehehe.. Didn't talk much to him. Surpringly, he asked me about my nephew. That's the last I expected to hear from him. Hee..

Ok.. am so sleepy! Another long day tomorrow.......

Date: Thursday, July 12, 2007
Time: 11:28:00 PM




These are the two non-baked cheesecake I did in less than 2 hours time all thanks to a last minute plan. And, I guess I was too tired that I poured in a lil more syrup than usual. And, I think its a lil wobbly but not so bad. Just hope everyone enjoys it.

I am so new to cake decoration; ok, I am lying. It had been ages since I did it. 6 years hiatus! Atie, darling.. I am practising for your big day ok. I'd promised urs would be definitely be nicer than these!

Date:
Time: 6:20:00 PM

I am so tired...... very very tired! Right now, my eyes could hardly open. I am forcing myself to stay awake especially with Incredible Tales is on tonight. And, I have some tasks at hand. Very last minute and very important. Will reveal the details tomorrow.

One day, if I ever lose my job or decide to call it quits from the education industry, I might be an events planner. A very 'dajal' one at that. I love giving people surprises but I don't like people to surprise me. Cos, I'll get emotional when I am surprised. Hehe.. And, usually its hard to surprise me cos I have done and thought of all kind of surprises before. Haha..

So far, in 2007.. the people who managed to surprise me and pull it off well was Sandra and hubby, The 'D','J','G' team and a couple of my former customers who managed to make my departure from Spin a memorable one.

Anyways.. I am glad that Friday is nearing real soon. This week had by far been my longest week of the year. And.. I am so freaking tired.

Last night, I had a long talk with 'P'. It did make my day, somehow... I am keeping my fingers crossed so that I can escape from working this Sat. But, chances are.. FAT Hope! But, yeah I just keep my fingers crossed and hope for a miracle. Miracles happen to those who believe in it.

Just now, despite looking so haggard... a salesgirl complimented me. She said I looked young. Too young to be a teacher. So I asked her, so how young did she think I was? She said around 22.. Haha... I was like, ha.. ok. When I was 21, some people thought I was 18. But ok, age doesn't matter to me. What matters most is, what I have learnt and the experienced gained during my time on Earth. So profound! Haha..

Ok.. back to my task. If I can post a picture tonight.. I will.

Date: Tuesday, July 10, 2007
Time: 11:07:00 PM

I am not too sure if I am being too sensitive.. But, I realised that ever since I went to the movie with 'R', his bestie 'P' have been ignoring me. I am wondering what did that pisang have been telling 'P' about me...

I am very sure that pisang have told 'P' about our movie date. And, 'P' must been upset because during the 2 months he was here, I never went out with him. I heard he'll be back for a holiday real soon (not so soon.. still about 3 months away), but I am pretty sure he won't even tell me about it now that things have turned out this way. And.. all thanks to that pisang kelat!

I am already in a disgruntled state of mind, and with all the current happenings, I can't take in anymore setbacks!

And, a few days ago.. my nephew said something that really hurts me. Its not about me but about someone related to me. Kids do not tell lies. But, why must my darling nephew says all that..? He did changed his opinion a few days later, though.. but isn't it too late?!

No, adik.. I don't hate you for airing your opinions. In fact, I encouraged and applaud you for being brave in airing your opinions just like me. But, yeah.. the truth hurts BIG time.

Date:
Time: 5:29:00 PM

I am glad that everything is over. Never in my bewilders dream, have I thought that I would be given a chance to do EMS. And, though the going was tough, I was glad that I had the chance to do EMS. I seriously had fun doing EMS. And, most were impressed by my flexibility. I guessed, it just came naturally. I had fun doing the resources for my Science class. Missed those science classes back in school.

Today, after school I went to the nearby supermarket to replenish my chocolates. I wished I could go to Candy Empire but was just too tired. On my way back, I bumped into 'V'. Yeah, but kind of avoided him cos I was caught my surprised. And as I walked away, I almost teared. But, I am still wondering why he did that..(why that sudden departure)

And yeah people, 9 more days! What more can I asked for? Peace!!

Date: Monday, July 9, 2007
Time: 5:38:00 PM

This week is going to be the longest week ever for me. Not only that I'll be in school from 7 am till tomorrow as I will be teaching EMS! I am going to do a specialize subject yet I am doing EMS during my last few days. But, I seriously have fun doing EMS cos I can be as sarcastic as sarcastic can get. Hahaha...

With the Open House this Sat and all... how can my week not be long enough?? Yeah, good luck to myself. With all the socialising plans on the list, I will just be a zombie comes next week. At least, I will have a shorter week next week. Yaaay!

On a sad note, I got the shocked of my life today! 'V' left. It was a great sudden. I was so overwhelmed by his departure. I kept on asking myself why?

Well.. just another 10 days. I'll survive this tought test. Everything happens for a reason. As much as it hurts, I guess I'll get stronger from the challenges.

Date: Sunday, July 8, 2007
Time: 10:58:00 PM

Date: Saturday, July 7, 2007
Time: 11:56:00 PM

Today, I went on a shopping spree. And, I really mean REAL shopping! But, I am still feeling upset despite the retail therapy. It's as if to say that I didn't get any satisfaction at all. I guessed, I am mentally very tired.

I seriously do not want to think about the damage done. Its really HUGE. I am feeling the pain cos I dun feel the sense of satisfaction. Geez!

I was shopping for a pair earring for one of my cousin. I was having that pissed look cos I was tired and the guy was shoving me selection after selection. In the end, he tried making conversation with me. And, he was so surprise that I am such a friendly and witty person. He said initially he was scared to approach me. Hahahaha..

Anyhow, I guessed I mellowed down a lot. In the past, I would throw tantrum every now and then and sulk with the person I am angry with for days or maybe weeks. But now, it just takes 5 minutes and I am ok. And.. yesterday I almost made my fav kiddo cried. Ooh.. I just didn't want him to CRY.. I was so angry with him for making a nuisance in my class. And I punished him. All I did was, made him talk in front of the whole class! But actually, I didnt want to do it. But, I have to make them know that whatever I say, I meant it. But I did reason it out with him at the end of it. I hope he understands.

See, even if you're the apple of my eyes... you'll still be scolded if you crossed the limits. Just ask my lil' devil how I punished him when he misbehaved.

**********************

I am still feeling shitty right now. I am not sure why. Is it because of THAT person? *shrugs*shrugs*shrugs*

No one matters more than you do.

Date:
Time: 1:59:00 PM

You Are a Double Espresso

Hey Energizer Bunny Girl! Do you ever slow down? You're a mix of high energy and ambition, perfectly matched with strong espresso When you want something you get it - by any means possible You're driven, determined, and no nonsense. Which is just how you like your java.

Does this reminds you all of ME?? Hands up if you think so! Lol..

Date: Friday, July 6, 2007
Time: 6:02:00 PM

And so, I defied all odds and managed to survive till Friday! So... yaay! Forgive me for blabbering nonsense here. I am having a massive headache right now. I have been sleeping at 12-1 am since Sunday night.. so that explains why.

I thought my weekend will be a peaceful one. Haha.. how cruel it was that it won't be as peaceful as I have wished for! Let me begin how the day started. Received a msg at abt 6.20 am today. My colleague told me that she would be on MC. So, I will have to relief her class. Ok, no prob. At least I won't be so bored. Everything went on fine till the meeting.

Barely an hour into the meeting, my head starts to 'scream' for help. And, it didnt stopped screaming till now. Perhaps because I didnt eat the whole day. But I have eaten yet the head is still spinning. And, I received a call about an hour ago asking me whether I could report at 7 am on next Mon and Tues. And.. I said YES!

You see, when my heads spin, I would just agree to everything and anything. Though the heart say NO, the mind said YES! All thanks to the headache! Then again, I have 11 more days left. Who cares and why bother????

One more bad news... my darling lil' devil, met with yet another accident last night. He hurt his right eye yet again. The last time he banged into those ceramic tables you find under the void decks. The corner of his eyes bled and the whole eyes were bruised like a panda. Today, as a result of yesterday's mishap.. he's like a pirate! His eyelids split open and he could barely open his eyes. It was no wonder that last night he came into my mind suddenly!! Haiz.. I don't know what to say about this accident prone child! He will turn blind if these goes on! Its barely 3 mths ago that he injured that same eye. And no, AGAIN!

Date: Thursday, July 5, 2007
Time: 10:42:00 PM

To my dear friend,

I might know why you're feeling the way you're right now. It's karma. Or retribution. Never make a promise if you never intend to fulfil it or never meant it. Think again, what you've done and you'll be enlighten. Trust me.


Yours Truly.

Date: Wednesday, July 4, 2007
Time: 11:41:00 PM

Last Friday morning, in the midst of trying to wake up for work as well as squeezing in whatever moments of sleep I could manage, I suddenly had this weird dream. As usual, I dreamt of my old work place. But, that day the dream seemed so real.

As expected, there have been plenty of changes in terms of staff and other things ever since I left. All of a sudden, my partner in crime came running to me to complain about how's stress she was and all. I was listening and comforting her when the alarm suddenly went off! Urgh...

Later in the day, I smsed her to ask how's she and stuff like that. I told her about what I dreamt about her and she told me that things were not as bad as I had dreamt about. Ok, fair enough. I was thinking too much, perhaps. Or rather, it was a wake up call for me. I had not contacted her ever since school began and I was busy settling my NIE stuff.

But, today.. she smsed and told me, "Hey your dream came true!" See, most of the time whatever I dream off would become a reality. Its either in a de-ja-vu feeling or a premonition of sort. I am beginning to think that I am creepy and scary! Lol..

Anyways, I am meeting up with her tomorrow to comfort her and relief her stress. Hope it works for both of us... For me, going back to HBF Spin is like a therapy where no other places can offer. And for her, seeing me and my silly antics would cool her down.

Ironically, when we first started off the working relationship, we couldn't see eye to eye. In the end, we're buddies now. Just see the number of people who hated working with me in the past have became my good friends or bitching buddies. Just don't judge a book by its cover. Its not easy to get into my good books but once you're there means you'll be there forever unless you choose to betray me, then I have nothing to say.

Date: Tuesday, July 3, 2007
Time: 10:54:00 PM

I am feeling guilty.. very guilty. I know I shouldn't be doing all these. I don't lack anything; but why did it happened? I got to snap out from this real soon before I drowned even further in this mess.

I've been through that harsh reality of life that I wouldn't want another girl to suffer the same fate as me. Or do I want to be the person who ruins someone else's happiness.

Why do I keep falling for the same person despite the fact that I have plenty of guy friends?

Why do Fate appears to be cruel enough as to create chances for me and 'C' and 'P' yet snatched it away when things were about to happen?

I've said before and I'll say it again, I can never sustain a long distance relationship. I've tried. But I failed. I've drifted further from 'P' and now with 'C' as well. I can't be bothered to contact him or simply have nothing to say. Unlike in the past, whenever I sees him, I have tons to say.

Whatever it is... I don't really care. Just that I am feeling guilty that I might be ruining someone else's happiness...... I can't share this with anyone and the feeling sux!

Its time to meet up with the people who made my life worth a million during that past two years! Barely 2 weeks school have started and I am going to run to them again to make me de-stress! And, I have not much energy left to last till Friday!!

Date:
Time: 4:49:00 PM

Two nights in a row, I came back after 12 am. And, now I am so sleepy!! Luckily, its a short day for me today. Last night, the lil' devil stayed guard till close to midnight to make sure I didn't sneak out and go home. He did that despite trying so hard to keep his sleepy eyes wide opened. Sheer cuteness, that lil' one.

This morning, I dreamt about something. It was so real. Now, I just can't remember what is it. Urgh..!

Today, time flew past me quite quickly. Perhaps because I was day dreaming more than usual. Hahaha... But still, I am bored to death.

I ran into him again today. I was so shocked to see him but as professionally and composed I could, I make a dash to my destination. I wonder why I kept on bumping into him of late.

*********

Date: Monday, July 2, 2007
Time: 11:55:00 AM

Last Friday, the meeting ended damn super early. I was elated. I got confused as to where to go before going to my nephew's place as my cousins' were not back from work yet. Since, we were going to celebrate the other nephew's birthday which fell on that Friday, I decided to go to Tanjong Pagar Plaza to get that after sought muffins. Unfortunately, only 4 flavours were left. But, still... its nice. Hehe..

I was really hungry by the time I reached Fajar. I had not have my breakfast and lunch. I would faint if I were to wait for dinner. And, my head were spinning. Hence, I decided to hang around at Mc to read some book tt was given to me earlier on. But halfway through, my cousin said she's coming back soon and asked me to follow her to my aunt's place to fetch the kiddos.

So, we went. And bought dinner at Greenridge. That was my supper. I finally had their chee cheong fun AGAIN! I was so bloated. But yeah, I was eating non-stop the whole of last week. The change in hormones! Lol..

I didnt go anywhere on Saturday. Initially, I wanted to go to Wild Wild Wet with the lil devil but he said he do not want to go for a swim. Then, I thought of going to the National Stadium closing ceremony. I tried to book tickets online but it seemed that tickets were sold out. As I anticipated that the stadium would be full house, I decided not to take chances. I ended up watching the Singapore-Australia match and the ceremony at home.

On Sunday, which was yesterday, I went to Vivo to catch Transformers. I used to like Transformers when I was younger. But, I guessed.. I am one of the rare finds who would say I didn't really enjoy the movie. There were funny moments though. But, I preferred Fantastic 4 better. Don't ask me why. Individual preferences. Peace.

Of late, I have been going to the movies quite often. I am not a movie-goer. And, I don't like going to the movies. But, ever since 'R' introduced me to the theatre at Vivo, I just can't stop myself from going there again and again. Haha.. But I guessed, it would just be another month. The soccer season would begin in mid-August. And yes, life will be back to normal by then. I won't have to think of what to do over the weekends!

************

I need to shower now... the lil' devil pestering me to go downstairs to buy that Ultraman cake we saw yesterday.